When You Want A New Start, But Wonder ‘Where Do I Begin?’
This is where we begin. From where we are. Right now is very important and, in fact, is the only moment that exists. There is no reverting to a previous moment, a save point in the journey. For someone like me who is very sensitive to the “story” of our lives, this is easier stated than embraced. We tend to think in such a linear fashion, but life is more like a cyclical starburst. It’s ever so easy to reflect and imagine a different recipe, composed of carefully chosen ingredients that may lead to a different “now.” It can be quite frustrating. However, this is also comforting. Time is too finite to seek to re-do every possible moment, even if you could. The encouraging thought is that since you only have right now, you know what to do next. Create a better “now” that comes next.
Still with me?
Learning to live differently starts today. Certainly, there is meaning in reflecting what was to help make sense of your current reality, to make amends, to choose differently. Then, that’s it. Let it go. If you are struggling with where you find yourself at this moment, let that be okay. Embrace the struggle, stand it with all the courage you can muster at this moment.
What is it that you want? Decide right now what that means to you. Start with one thing. There may be many things you’d like to grow into a reality. Beautiful. Write those down. Have you allowed yourself to fall into a rut, either physically, mentally, or spiritually? Do you feel utterly out-of-touch with your life or perhaps with those around you? It may be something as specific as seeking to go back to school to pursue a career path or as general as finding a sweet spot, a springboard from which you can move forward in all aspects of your life. Let’s pick one today and start there.
For me, it was realizing that the paradigm of my life had become a small, airless room in my head and heart. It happened slowly to me, much like the plight of the poor frog sitting in a cool pot of water and then realizing a bit too late that you are becoming a soup in the boiling water around you. I felt that I had tuned out of a frequency that connected me to others and to myself, and I was left in a bit of a void.
For now, just choose to begin. Be aware that you are and begin in each new moment to be present where you are. Start by showing up for even the smallest moments of your life. If you find you are wandering away, then keep practicing coming back to the current moment and breathe. Show up for your life. That’s where you begin.