Dear Summer in East Texas,

Can we talk? I have concerns about where our relationship is going. So, 2022 has already been a heck of a year.

So please, take it a little easy on us, heat-wise?

Yes, I know we've just begun our yearly journey together. Yes, I know 'tis only June, but already the temperatures have risen to the unbearable setting. Yes, I am utterly grateful to you for the blossoming world your particular weather parameters make possible. Though, without the gift of regular rainfall, even that has been an issue this year.

The cycle that leads to the days that are like living in a series of humid, sauna-boxes will continue to amplify until we all run to our little caves for fear of spontaneously bursting into flames like vampires that stayed up past sunrise.

Soon, the pressure of the humidity will quickly surround us and we will panic, realizing we've left our oxygen masks inside.

I can see it now: The wasp minions will have spotted me and they will begin to hover and dart, hover and dart, ever-present as I trod down the driveway to the mailbox "mini-roaster" to get my mail.

Of course, I've forgotten my oven mitts, so it's a series of little grasps, pulls, and gasps before I can rescue the bills and letters, which are noticeably singed in certain places.

I know, I know there are many who revel in you, Summer in East Texas. They wait all year and cheer and 'woot' at your arrival. They can't wait to put on flip-flops and soak out in the sun until little flames start rising from the pools of their sweat. These fire people have my awed respect, with their white teeth smiling broadly out of their tanned glee-filled faces.

KKTX FM logo
Get our free mobile app

These summer people will attend festivals in the high heat, where hundreds or thousands of other sun worshipers gather together to mill about, brushing slippery shoulders with each other on the way to the beer tents. *Sigh* I am clearly missing some gene that enables me to put on my own virtual fire suit and also smile out of my own tanned face.

They don't care that huge spiders have spread webs so large that they might actually trap a small dog, or that the snakes in East Texas are slithering into a scalish frenzy, locking tails dancing to an exotic victory song, forming a circle around trapped humanity. No, no.. that's all fine.

Now, don't get me wrong Summer in East Texas. We have had some marvelous times...like at that water park when I was ten years old?

Yeah, those were some beautiful, sun-scorched moments. But, some grown women *tend* to avoid water parks because at that point they are compelled to unsheathe themselves to all the world.

And some of us aren't too fond of that when it involves whipping one's body through the elements. (Although I do love water slides...and some beaches...so that is a risk I am willing to take.)

So, I hope you understand. Can we work together here? Can you take it a bit easy on us cooler weather lovers? Show us more of your best moments. Like when you send those warm kisses of a breeze straight from the lips of Zephyr himself as twilight falls.

I wouldn't mind more of those moments when I'm swimming in a private setting, silently gliding in the evening after the wasp demons have put aside their terrorist duties and subsided for the day. That would be wonderful.

I sincerely appreciate you and the setting you provide for some of the most fun we can have as humans. Just, take it easy?

Blazing Hot Regards,

Tara

P.S...I really do like the popsicles and blooming hibiscus.  Thank you for that.

[PHOTOS] A Life-Sized 'Barbie Dream House' is Coming to Texas This Summer

So what can we expect from this exciting, immersive experience? Here are some initial photos of what you'll be walking into this summer in Houston, TX!

Check Out These Great Texas Getaways Just In Time For Summer

Top 10 Ways to Lower Your A/C Bill This Summer

More From KKTX FM