How To *Not* Get The Deep, Healing Sleep You Need At Night

Humans. We're such rebels. I don't know why. Perhaps it all did, indeed, begin in a garden somewhere in Mesopotamia where a lady was forbidden to eat a piece of fruit--which then she did. I wonder if she'd been told to eat that fruit, EAT IT!!!....if she would've felt as compelled to do so.

OK, OK, chill out. I'm just teasing.

Because of our rebellious tendencies, it is sometimes helpful to come at things from another perspective. For example, we all know we're *supposed* to get to bed at a reasonable hour and we've likely heard various things that may really help. However, some of us nod in affirmation and then continue to do the very things that oppose what we're supposed to want--like going to bed at a reasonable hour and/or getting the high-quality sleep we need to get us through the next day. Well.

Thus, let's talk about ways you can avoid getting that all important shut-eye for which your body so desperately longs:

Stare at screens right up to the point where you must sleep. Yep, that's right. Watch the most adrenaline-boosting shows you can find. Bonus points if you're alternate between that and scrolling, scrolling, scrolling through your social media pages. Let in as much of the artificial blue light as you can. When it's truly time to go to sleep, I guarantee you'll lay in bed and stare at the ceiling in the dark for many strange, lonely hours.

Drink lots of alcohol. Yeah, I know "night caps" are supposed to be a thing and all, but...Although alcohol will have a sedating effect on you and may help you nod off more quickly, studies show that you won't be getting the full range of much needed deep sleep you need.

Obviously, lots of late day caffeine will help. Ah, there's nothing like evening coffee or, if you're really edgy, downing one of those insane energy drinks in an effort to "get ahead" on your work for the next week. That'll definitely block adenosine--a very important sleep hormone.

Get your mind really engaged in a video game, board game, or other strenuous mental activity. Bonus points for loud music and bright lights. You don't want a relaxing evening reading by lamplight to sabotage your all-nighter efforts, do you?

Speaking of lights, rebel: If you want to go all out, head to your bathroom and just gaze catatonically at those overhead sink lights for about ten to fifteen minutes. This will create an artificial day in your brain and stop the flow of melatonin, which is released in your brain to help you sleep at night.

There ya go--just a few ideas to get ya going. What other ways can we seriously hinder our chances of getting a crucially important good night's sleep? Let me know in the comments.

More coffee, anyone?